Feeling Good

Dear Reader,

So, its been a really long time since my last post, in fact, I think its almost a month and I feel bad because I kept having all of these ideas (which I should have written down) and then I didn’t act on them or do anything useful. since I’ve been on the 150mg dose of Sertraline I’ve been feeling pretty good. And I think I have finally found “the dose”

What I mean by “the dose” is I think I’ve finally found the right dose of medication that’s working for me and maybe just knowing that has made me feel a lot more positive about things.

Well, I’ve been very up and down but mostly up. I tend to fall down very, very fast but just as soon as it down it back up again so. That’s been alright. I don’t know if the fact that two parcels I’ve been waiting to arrive for almost a month arrived has contributed today but I am feeling really good right now!

I have just got back from my latest doctors appointment. My doctor was in a good mood which also made me happy. And he said straight away that he could see a change in me, which I guess is a positive!

So, he renewed all my regular prescriptions, the contraceptive pill, my allergy nose spray, my sertraline. And then I told him about a little problem I was having.

If you read my last piece you will know I was having a bit of a problem climaxing during sexual activity. Well, let’s just say it hasn’t improved. Well, after 4 weeks of trying we have had two positive sexual experiences, which was a little frustrating. But I felt I owed it to myself and to my partner to talk to my doctor and maybe get a better idea of how to work around this.

I told him I was having an embarrassing problem related to sex, he asked what it was. I was honest and he told me not to be embarrassed, he didn’t laugh at me but I laughed and I guess he was just happy that I wasn’t crying or telling him I was going to hurt myself. So he prescribed me Sildenafil, which most of us would commonly know as viagra. Ill be honest, I didn’t know women could take viagra. But apparently they can. So I guess that’s exciting, although I am kind of nervous about trying it.

Its strange, I remember being terrified of talking about sex and important issues that effected my emotions a few years ago, its something I have learned from my parents and I still don’t feel comfortable discussing my emotions with them or certain other people in my life, including certain friendship groups. But other people I can be so open and honest with that I think sometimes it worries them.

A few years ago, I would have been horrified at the thought of having a prescription for viagra, but now. I find it kind of funny. And I’m looking forward to the experience and what I am going to be able to write about it.

But, of course, this is all fodder for another fantastic post. and so. I will end this here.

It won’t be so long between posts this time.

As Always,

The Elephant in the Room

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6 thoughts on “Feeling Good

  1. I’m so glad you are finally feeling so good! Ironically, I have also recently found ‘the dose’ for myself. It feels great. My doctor was also elated I am no longer worrying her with disturbing thoughts and desires. I hope you are able to climax with the viagra! You deserve maximum pleasure.

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  2. I’m so happy you found the right med and dose! I hope you’re still doing well most of time at least. I know some days are better than others.

    Don’t feel bad about not writing. It comes with the territory of mental illness. Pressuring yourself could easily help trigger a mood swing. Lol, I’ve got about five pieces in various stages of writing now.

    I can relate to being more open with strangers than with friends and family. For me they don’t have an opportunity to criticize me as harshly. They tend to listen more and my expectations of them being supportive is lower so there’s not much room for them to let me down.

    Can’t wait to hear how you’re doing more recently…

    Liked by 1 person

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