I’m Not Getting Any Better

I can’t believe I have to do this. But.

TRIGGER WARNING: Talk of suicide.

Dear Reader,

Jeez where do I begin, I guess I could start by saying I’ve had 3 of the last 6 weeks off of work, as holiday, see I hadn’t had any time off since march and I guess I thought I needed it. But I didn’t. I really, didn’t need it.

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Losing A Whole Year

Dear Reader,

I know I keep blabbing on about this book and who knows if I will do it. Sometimes I feel like an idiot for starting it, sometimes I’m really positive. Sometimes I just want to do it for me, sometimes I just want to do it for everyone else.

All I know is the book will more than likely be a narcissist’s dream. Anyway, Here is something I wrote exclusively for the book but decided to post because I wanted to show you that I am at least trying to make it a bit more well written than my blog.

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The Funeral

Dear Reader,

I despise being woken up early. So when I was woken at 7am by my mum for a funeral that started at 10am I wasn’t happy, I wake up at the most 1.5 hours before I need to be somewhere. There is no need for me to be awake earlier. So I got an extra 15 minutes in before she began the old, school ritual of yelling “are you awake?”  through my door. The panicky feeling began when I woke up, and it didn’t stop all day. Continue reading