Jealousy and Fear

Dear Reader,

I’m in a weird place again, I’m not happy, I’m not enjoying my life. I’m just moving forwards because it’s the only direction to go. Next week my counselling sessions with Mind will end and I am absolutely terrified.

Trigger Warning (Brief Suicide mention)

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Feeling Good

Dear Reader,

So, its been a really long time since my last post, in fact, I think its almost a month and I feel bad because I kept having all of these ideas (which I should have written down) and then I didn’t act on them or do anything useful. since I’ve been on the 150mg dose of Sertraline I’ve been feeling pretty good. And I think I have finally found “the dose”

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Mirrored Sympathy

Dear Reader,

So, since I started writing here I think I have become a lot more sympathetic to people’s problems. I’ve learnt that regardless of the size of the problem to the outside, that problem could be devastating to the individual and because of that its impossible to judge how something can affect someone. We all react to things differently.

Let me tell you a little story…. Continue reading

My Brain Is About To Explode.

Dear Reader,

So it’s been a week since my doctors visit which I didn’t talk about because I was upset at the time and I still am now. I was happy to be going to see a doctor that was really nice and supportive last time I saw him and that made me feel better. But his attitude was different this time and I just left feeling deflated. Continue reading

Doctor, Doctor, My Brain Hates Me.

Dear Reader,

On Thursday, I went to the doctors for the first time in what feels like forever. I really should have gone last week but as there were no available appointments I had to wait until one was available. Unfortunately as I opted to get an appointment on my day off, it also meant I wasn’t able to see my regular doctor, I had to see a doctor I had never heard of, so naturally I imagined it would be another trainee.

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Where Do I Begin

Dear Reader,

Trigger Warning: Self Harm

It’s been over a week since I last posted, and to be honest I’m not really sure why. I have been really struggling with my motivation recently. But I feel like that’s an excuse, and I don’t want to use excuses. Because the truth is that writing and knowing people want to read it, is really one of the only things I have in my life. Now that may sound a bit dramatic. But honestly. The only “constant” things I really have are this blog and work. Continue reading